12.12

I feel huge as though I am bursting out of my skin. It's a horrible feeling. I can feel my skin ripping as enormous stretch marks appear down my hips and thighs and the fat around my knees is swollen. I am so bloody fat and I don't seem to be able to stop overeating. I also have a cold.

Not a good day. Actually, this could be a brilliant day as I could do better.

12.12

Oh no. I am addicted to the following things:

Chocolate, particularly Cadbury's boosts
Chocolate Hob Nobs
Greggs the Bakers
Tara on toast
Fresh bread and butter
MacDonalds rubber eggs on muffins
More chocolate.

I am a bit surprised I don't weigh more given my recent binges.

12.11

All because I went out to lunch on Tuesday and ate an enormous plate of pasta and cheese with garlic bread, focaccia, olives and lots of wine. It was delicious. I am still full thinking about it. I have also been attacking chocolate of late. This is diabolical. I will have to think of something to keep me on track or I will explode.

My trip Biarritz is about 6 weeks away. Right, six weeks of good dieting should do the trick. I am aiming for a stone lighter. I am going to have to exercise more than an occasional little swim. Time to dust off the exercise DVDs. Groan.

12.10

Went out for pizza and Mr Smith bought donuts for tea. I gave dinner a miss but still feel very fat.

12.9

Dropping.

12.10

Ghastly headache but weight is going down. Is it just water loss? Probably.

12.11

Does this mean acai berry works? I am certainly pooing more efficiently. Well, I will keep taking a massive six every day and see if I turn purple. I think they curb the appetite a bit. I am certainly not hungry.

12.12

Desperately need to exercise. Lunchtime swim.

Counting down to trip to Biarritz. It is about 7 weeks away. Ok let 's go for 2pounds a week. That's a stone by 7 weeks.

12.13

I feel monstrously fat and very heavy today. I am drinking vile green tea and taking acai berry capsules. I guess this is a sort of detox. Thought I'd better give body something to actually eliminate so lots of wine seemed a good idea. This morning it was cooked breakfast. Let's see how you get on with that lot, acai berries.

12.12

I have been quite good lately. Obviously not good enough. Dieting means starving otherwise it simply doesn't work. I'm hungry. I'm also depressed but I think it's just post euphoria as I return to earth with a bump. Thank goodness I have work to fall back on. Dentist today.

12.12

Doing ok and exercising lots but maybe not lots enough as I am obviously still doing more in than out. Did hit the booze yesterday as we had champagne with the client then I had lots of wine at home with dinner. I also had an amazing chocolate cake with the Lovely Thin Claudia.

Oh I ended up eating pancakes because the Best Boy suddenly decided he wanted pancakes for pudding as he missed pancake day. Gosh, the things we do for love.